Houston

***This post was started some time ago and only completed today, so please excuse some of the dated references***

I drove around today with a pit in my stomach. Nestled next to me on the passenger seat was a crisp maroon folder with papers tucked inside that I have been avoiding all week. Papers that will change our lives.....well, at least they are the first BIG step to the change. Printed on this flimsy 8.5x11 legally binding material was the real estate listing agreement for our house. That's right, we're selling our house and moving to a new city. Everything that we have been working so diligently toward over the last 15 months has finally come to this most "real" step. I have always had the confidence that John would be accepted to law school, and that we would most definitely go....but somehow the reality of that transition didn't fully hit me until today. I am also mostly certain that the full impact will not be truly realized until we actually leave. Nonetheless, I found myself lost in memory and sentiment today....not only about this particular house, but about Houston in general. When I came to the city in 2002 for nursing school, I was embarking on my first solo adventure with absolutely no safety net. I moved into an apartment by myself and started school in a place where I knew absolutely no one. I had never lived alone, I had never been to Houston, and I was not completely convinced I even wanted to be a nurse! I came here to take a chance. I wanted a chance at a solid career with a respectable income that wouldn't forfeit time at home with the children I desired in the future. I took a chance that Houston was the most likely city that my true love would return to once he found his way back to Texas. I embraced my time alone in the city and I have such an overwhelming feeling of pride and resilience when I think back on those early times at the Maroneal before I made friends.

Friends. Oh, the brilliant, beautiful, passionate, and true friends I have made over the last seven years. My chest could cave in if not for the swell in my heart as I envision each of your faces. The ways that you have stretched, challenged, supported, intrigued, and entertained me.....the love I have for and with each of you will surpass any time or distance I can imagine.
Amy and Kristen....how could I have ever survived the toils of nursing school without your witty banter, ridiculously non-productive study sessions, and truly genuine friendship. Though our mass production of children over the last 3 years has kept us apart more than I like, I will always cherish the non-stop party that we had as group. A smile never leaves my face when reminiscing over that time. I miss you and love you both.
Destiny.....could our two paths have been more flawlessly crossed at the most perfect of times?? Our love for you and Brad is so deep, and our friendship with you set the standard for what perfect "couple friends" are. No one could ever duplicate the many nights we spent laughing, cooking, playing games, walking, wining, whining, and WINNING!!! Those boys never stood a chance! Having you mere footsteps away for those years, and being able to share in the joy of being pregnant together is forever branded on my heart. Breckin and Jack were belly buddies, and you can see it in their adoration for each other today!
Holly....there are too many words....that's why you got your own blog entry a while back :) Although God has a limitless imagination, he didn't really use it with our friendship, because we are so perfectly and divinely matched. You have strength in my weaknesses, and we fill each others' empty spaces. We are nothing short of sisters born of different wombs. Although we were friends before we ever had children, you are so intertwined in the experiences of my motherhood that I can hardly remember a time before we shared that joy. I love the way you love my children, and I in turn cherish Aubrey. The great sadness that looms over our upcoming transition is greatly attributed to the fact that I won't be able to see you everyday. How ever will I manage?? I take comfort in the text you sent me....true friendship means being able to grow separately without growing apart.
Mel, Kara, Abi, and Jessica.....the combination of your names takes NOTHING away from the distinct and true love that I have for each one of you and your children. I place you in a group, because that is our identity in each other.....the Hermann girls. Without you my hair would be completely gray and I would be rocking aimlessly in a cold, dark corner.....mumbling. Your support, love, and advice has aided me in becoming the mother I am today. Individually: Mel, I love you for your attention to the small details that always make me feel loved and appreciated (notes, cards, cookies, emails). You are ever thoughtful and always encouraging. Kara, I love you for your no-bones, give-it-to-me-straight nature. I can always come to you for experienced truth and advice (mixed in with your yummy, sweet, nice to everybody on EARTH nature)! Abi, I love you for your free-spirited and Christ-centered approach to life. Not to mention that you keep me rolling on the floor laughing out loud with your blog posts about Max...thank you for keeping parenting fun! Jessica, I love you for the perfect blend of brutal honesty and genuine empathy that you embody. I know I can always count on you to tell me when when I'm six weeks past a highlight/haircut OR to be the shoulder I cry on (or ear to gripe to) at the end of a rough day. I mentioned to Abi the other day that we are such a tremendously eclectic group of girls that blend so seamlessly. No where else could you see so many polar opposite personalities thrive and enrich each others' lives without killing one another. I pull strength and inspiration from each of your parenting styles and marriages, and in Kara's words, I worship each of your children. They are invaluable and precious to me and my boys. I cringe to think of how much Jack will miss them....especially Bella (I think he wants to marry her!!)
Amanda....so dubiously nicknamed my "new friend" by my brother, I have rarely formed such a deep bond in such a short time. I know God placed you in my life to revive parts of myself that have long since been dormant. You are such a strong, self assured, and steadfast woman, and yet you are equally vulnerable, flexible, and a complete goof....I DIG that about you! In addition, it has been wonderful to have "family friends" close by. The Zellers have certainly kept us entertained, and you will be missed greatly.

How could I pay tribute to Houston without acknowledging how unbelievably devastating it will be to live apart from my brother. We have followed and supported each other our whole lives, and we have never lived apart for more than a year in our adult lives. I have grown to depend on you in so many more ways than you will ever know. The tough talks of life are best analyzed and sorted out with you. As different as we are, our brains operate on the same frequency and we just GET each other. I value your opinions so highly, and I am most convicted and encouraged by your advice. I am your biggest fan, and I truly cannot imagine my life without you close by. Weekends feel empty when you are not around now, I can't imagine them when you are 9 hours away. I am so proud of you, and I have total confidence in your ability to thrive here in Houston. For that reason alone, I will not grovel and beg for you to follow us to Lubbock. You have not only sprouted new wings over the last few months, but you have taken flight!!! You are reaching the potential that has always been there, but have been too timid to see. The best is yet to come in your life Big Brother, and I cannot wait to see what the future holds.

This is beginning to sound more like a eulogy, so maybe I should move beyond the "survived by" portion and express my true joy and excitement for what lies ahead for the Shanklins. For too long John's intelligence has been under-challenged, and his expertise has been under-utilized. I cannot even begin to imagine what is possible once his full potential is realized. I don't mean to imply that he could only be useful as a lawyer, but beyond law school John will finally have the ability to make the difference he has so long desired. He will have the opportunity to make an imprint on society in a special way. His brilliance, passion, and goodness will have an outlet beyond his family and friends. The boys and I love him deeply and truly believe in his upcoming success. I also look forward to bearing the burden for him for a change. John has done such an amazing job taking care of me and our family over the last 5 years, and it will be an honor to support and encourage him. In addition, I am blessed beyond measure to be moving near my parents. It makes me giddy to envision the boys growing up near their grandparents. There is so much love to share and so many memories to make!! So though the sorrow will last for a while, His joy is on the horizon. Stay tuned for bigger and better things to come for us....We love you Houston! This is how I felt.