This is How I Felt

This may not be exactly how it happened, but this is how I felt. I chose this as the theme for my blog, because I feel it characterizes how I view my life. My stories are always a little exaggerated. My memories are always a little bit dramatic. The fraction of difference between what I really experience and how I recall it is not what counts. What really matters is how I feel. That is what I wanted this blog to be. Not an account of events in my life but how those events made me feel. I believe that is what is important. In a year it will be nice to look back and say that on March 16th Jack rolled over for the first time. However, in 5 years when I've had 2 or 3 kids roll over what will really make an impact is how I felt with Jack. What it felt like to be a new mommy and watch my first child reach his milestones. It's not important that trumpets didn't really sound and that squirrels didn't really stand on their haunches and cheer....what's important is that that's how I remember it. That's how I felt. This is true in all aspects of life. I can tell a stranger that God's son was sent to earth to die for our sins. I can tell that person that when you accept this as truth, and believe it, your entire life will change. How do you know? The way that you feel. The way that you just know. The warmth of peace rushing over you. The chill bumps you get when a stiff breeze feels like the very touch of God. The eerie feeling of knowing that something "had to be God." It's dangerous to trust feelings sometimes. I don't want the power of God to be minimized by suggesting He only exists in our feelings, but I know that a person's experiences and what they feel can often reach people more easily than the confusing text of the Bible. All that said, I hope to chronicle my feelings and experiences. It is a therapeutic release for me, which hopefully provides a glimpse into my soul at this time. I write only for myself. Not to sound selfish, but to clarify that no one's thoughts or feelings will restrict the free flow from me. This is a diary of my journey. This is who I am. This is how I felt.